Reforming my theology can be
both easy and difficult at the same time. One of the difficulties is trying to
find a new language that gives clear expression to my reforming stance –
especially, I find, in my own spirituality. Take the prayer ‘Come, Holy
Spirit,’ for example. It slips so easily off the tongue following years of
being involved in the charismatic stream.
Absent Father?
But why do I call for the
Holy Spirit to come and why do I call for God’s presence when I believe that
God is present with me, as promised? If it has been God’s plan to be present in
his creation through tabernacle, temple, Jesus and then church; if I am only
able by the Spirit to say ‘Jesus is Lord’; if I am only able to call out ‘Abba,
Father’ through the Spirit of adoption, then surely the Holy Spirit is present
with me, in me and through me. But I still catch myself praying, ‘Come, Holy
Spirit’ as if I were staring into some black void reaching out for the divine.
Awareness
So now I’m trying to teach
myself not to call for God’s presence – but to be aware of his presence. And I have to be willing for him to do that
in any way he chooses. It’s not for me to box him in in any way. The measure of
his presence should never be limited by my expectations. The preaching may not
be at its most anointed; the worship may not have a high-octane zip to it;
there may not be people stumbling around in a drunken stupor; but God is still
present.
Help me be aware of your
presence, Father.
