It may be the season to be jolly but the good people of Glastonbury are in mourning. For them, this Christmas holds little joy; tears are closer than turkey; and the figgy pudding will have a bitter taste. And what, you ask, vexes them so? Their holly tree has been cut down. And this was no ordinary holly tree for its roots (no pun intended) go right back to Joseph of Arimathea. You’ll find the AP story written up here and the Independent also had a comment piece on the news here.

For nearly 2,000 years this tree has stood proudly near the summit of Wearyall Hill. The AP report tells us that ‘the original tree was planted by St. Joseph of Arimathea’ when he put his staff into the ground as he rested from all his travels. You and I, of course, know him as plain old Joseph and have little concern as to whether he was canonised by a Pope or not. In the Independent, however, mysteriously he becomes Jesus’ uncle. No – really. You missed that little fact in the Gospels didn’t you?

Anyway, ever since Uncle Joe stepped onto England’s green and pleasant land (not that England existed then, of course, but why let a fact get in the way of a rousing song) the tree, or its descendants, has been sprouting every Christmas and Easter. Apparently Christians have been coming to the site for centuries. You see, this special tree draws crowds. As does its landscape which apparently has ‘magical qualities’ and has, therefore, ‘drawn pagan worshippers for many years’ also. Quite.

And if that were not enough reason for us to laud the great holly tree of Glastonbury then surely the fact that a cutting from its boughs graces the Christmas dinner table of the Queen each year will surely have you in awe and wonder. According to AP, ‘The sprig is sometimes visible during her televised Christmas broadcast to the Commonwealth — and the queen always sends a letter of thanks.’ She’s good like that.

So the tree is special. Indeed, according to Katherine Gorbing, director of Glastonbury Abbey, ‘It’s a sacred tree. Not only for the Christian Church, but for many other people.’

But who would have dared to chop it down? The Mayor, John Coles, has a suggestion, ‘It could be an anti-monarchist, an anti-Christian, or someone who's an atheist.’  Does anyone know whether Richard Dawkins is a republican? He certainly fits two of the three descriptions. Though thinking about it, I doubt they’re atheists since they must be far too busy falling over themselves laughing at the Christian-pagan syncretistic nonsense that the tree represents.

But I have another suggestion to make as to who the culprit could be. Is it possible after decades of having to write a thank you note for a measly sprig of holly that in order to save herself some time this year it was the Queen herself?

Whatever. If this post has dripped too much with sarcasm for your taste, I apologise. It’s just that at times I despair at the crap that is connected to our faith.